Our life has been bleetastic, bleebastic, and generally just all about blee for the past 30 days. Tonight, at 7:14pm blee will have been on the outside for thirty full days. Many of them wonderful, many of them quite difficult.
cute onesie courtesty of mamamonkey.etsy.com.
Mondays are always rough for me and yesterday was no exception. The kid is sucking me dry literally and figuratively. I nearly had a breakdown near the end and am still quite shut down and depressed. Last night was another difficult night starting around 4 or 5am. It is hard for me to know what time it is lately. Jon knew how bad I was doing and took care of her and let me sleep when I could, except for at the end when I knew he was doing badly and I took over.
The Open Studios over the weekend went so well that I ended up doing a half day on Sunday and am very happy that I did. And it isn't about the money, even though I made a good amount. But I had such a great time seeing people from last year and connecting with other artists as well as the people that came to talk to me. I had brought along one of my carved blocks and stuck up quite a few conversations about the process. People seemed pretty interested in it. Some of them bought from me, and some did not but I enjoyed it regardless of making a sale or not. And by the end of Sunday I only had a few business cards left from my stack and all my promo bookmarks were gone. I wish I had gotten Moo cards!
The weekend was dangerous because it gave me a taste of my old life, of freedom to a degree. And I realized how much I miss it. How much I want to make new work. And not just because I feel pressured to keep producing and selling but because it is something that I truly enjoy. Something that keeps me happy and sane. But currently all my free time goes into cleaning or I am so beat down tired that I can't do anything remotely productive. Yet I rarely have time to nap because she isn't down long enough during the day.
And I can't even work on art until I clean up my studio from the mess that getting ready for the Open Studios in a flurry caused. Throughout the day during blee downtime I would rush clean so I got some done, but I miss the spotless studio I had months ago. Currently it is clean enough to carve, but not to print. I do have a bit of carving to do before I can print and then I will need to clean up after that. Jon offered me some time this weekend to print but I don't feel hopeful about it. Plus the weekend seems very far away.
Look at me, feeling sorry for myself and depressed on my beautiful daughters first big milestone. Later today we go to the pediatrician for her checkup and will find out just how much of a hungry hungry hippo she has been! The big weigh in! Born at 8lbs 6oz, any bets on where she is at now?
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5 comments:
Oh, Marissa, you are moving right along. Having a new baby is very isolating and it knocks you out of your realm for a while. It took me two months to get my head above water, so you seem to be doing well. Hang in there! You, Jon, and blee are in our prayers!
Life is so very different after kids. I'm glad you had a great weekend with the Open Studio.
Hey mLee -- Glad you were able to do the show and enjoy it. You will get more of that as time goes by.
Happy one month to bLee!!
It's always a bit hard when things change. Your doing great though. :) She is beautiful!
*HUGS*
Alexandra is gorgeous! Congrats on your 30 days together :)
Hang in there - the first 3 months are the hardest - well, they were for me anyway - with both children - because they both suffered from colic and reflux and never slept during the day!!!
It's still tough, but now i snatch moments to do my own stuff at night when they are in bed...lol i've become a night owl!
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