I've been feeling rather irritable with increasing depression ever since mid-day yesterday. First I was just in shock and then it started to turn into depression. The cat combined with everything else is really getting to me. And I have a sinus headache again and am almost out of sudafed. Why does pregnancy give me allergy symptoms?
I haven't been able to drag myself out of bed to try to do something to cheer myself up by being productive. I am a little afraid of failure. Of being reminded how sore I am and that I have been in bed these past weeks for a reason.
I have lots of books that I could read but I don't want to for some reason. Haven't been able to focus on a book in a couple of months now. Don't want to put on a movie or even watch silly youtube videos. The headache doesn't help. I ate some cereal for breakfast along with a cup of tea yet I still feel very weak and feeble like I haven't eaten a thing.
Honestly right now I don't even feel excited about the baby. I just feel worn out and sad. Distracted and ill prepared like I missed my window.
At least there are threads like this one on Etsy that do a bit to cheer me up at least temporarily. It is very sweet of them to care though sometimes I do feel a little weird (and somewhat guilty) that I seem to house a bit of an Etsy celebrity! I guess Etsy admin Matt has been going around for months saying she would be born on his birthday. That he prophesied it. Well, his birthday came and went yesterday. Sorry Matt, I do wish you had been correct. One thing is for sure I really do need to gather up threads like these and print them out for the baby book! Some of them are classic!
People are really acting funny about this baby like we are going to have it and not tell anybody. Yesterday both my grandmother and my dad called asking for news. Right before we got off the phone both of them reminded me that they expect a call when the big event happens. Jon's family has been the same. And so have friends. Of course we are going to call and contact people! Isn't that kind of a given? Weird.